


Missive Mishaps

by LearaBribage



Category: Les Misérables (2012), Les Misérables (TV 2000), Les Misérables - All Media Types, Les Misérables - Schönberg/Boublil, Les Misérables - Victor Hugo
Genre: Enjolras Has Feelings, F/M, enjonine - Freeform, fé/els, think p&p except darcy is bolder, victorian letter style, Éponine Is Bad At Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-12
Updated: 2019-04-27
Packaged: 2020-01-11 23:42:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18434549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LearaBribage/pseuds/LearaBribage
Summary: Enjolras writes his feelings for Éponine. Éponine hasn't responded back yet. Or has she? Or has the post been delayed?Find out as Jehan Prouvaire attempts to create an anthology of these missive mishaps, Combeferre loses his mind, and the rest join the hilarity as Gavroche messes it all up.(Screams of frustration ensue.)





	1. In Which Égalité Means, “I Wish To Ravish You Most Thoroughly”

**Author's Note:**

> Note: Prompt fill for a request I forgot I wrote in tumblr for decembersiris back in early 2017. I found this in my drafts, and well, I’ll just see how it goes because I’m experimenting with it. Her prompt was Enjonine exchanging letters. I have put a slight twist to it, but anyway, I hope you enjoy it!

**DATE: 29 JANUARY 1834**

**TO: ÉPONINE TH **ÉNARDIER  
       NO. 32, RUE DE LA GRAND TRUANDERIE****

****FROM: ENJOLRAS  
             NO. 10, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU ** **

 

 

> _Dear Éponine,_
> 
> _First, I admit — you would not catch me penning letters of this nature. Letters are conversations that I surmise are best spoken in the presence of the intended individual. That way, though brief, there is no mistaking in the climes with which both parties are supposedly discussing. All that was merely chimera in the head are realised into rhapsodies. Discourse, after all, is an organ of what makes us all equal. At least, this is what I practise, and it is what I eventually hope to come in meeting the finesse of your mind and soul._
> 
> _Second, I confess — though I would prefer speaking to you, I have to understand the gift of sincerity that letters permit the reader to reckon. You perceive the threads of life in a person through their handwriting. Thus, their intentions lay clear before the light upon you. It is quite like the journals one turn to when discourse with friends is no longer helping, and silence with these pristine leaves do better in lessening the weight in your chest. Perhaps, that is why the written word is still and will always be important to any facet of society. It is rather ironic because it can easily be burned and lost forever, but there is a certain permanence attached to it, courtesy of the various attempts of the human race on its immortality. This is why I write to you, and it is with profound feelings for you that I do it._
> 
> _Third, I concede — to the longings I have been feeling for you. Your presence has become heavily imprinted in my thoughts. My pathetic attempts in eluding it have only brought the profound realisation that is this: I aim to reach the depths of your heart and mind, and to honour it most fervently. Not by conquering it, for that is not who you are, and I have seen the tenacity of your individuality. Where most find it obstinate, as I have before I came to know you better, now, my view is altered as you have altered me. You must find me irrational as I speak of you this way, but you… have undone me in such a way that I cannot ever find repulsive. I do not speak of you lightly. I hold you in such esteem and wonder… and I cannot but wish to… hope I can persuade you to meet that certain passion with me._
> 
> _Ah, there it is, I have said much, and I hope I stir not confusion, but clarity as regards to what I think has been occurring between us. If it really is what I think it is. If it even is also what you desire._
> 
> _Nonetheless, if it is not, I still wish you more days of warmth filled with laughter. Your happiness is a priority to me._
> 
> _With fervent affection,_
> 
> _Enjolras  
>  _

* * *

 

**DATE: 01 FEBRUARY 1834**

**TO: COMBEFFERE **  
****NO. 15, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU********

****FROM: ENJOLRAS  
             NO. 10, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU ** **

 

 

> _Combeferre,_
> 
> _There, I sent the letter to Éponine. It has been three days, but it is no matter. Surely. I am quite familiar with waiting._
> 
> _Enjolras_

* * *

 

 

**DATE: 02 FEBRUARY 1834**

**TO: ENJOLRAS **  
****NO. 10, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU********

****FROM: COMBEFFERE  
            NO. 15, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU** **

 

 

> _Enjolras,_
> 
> _Well, I am rather happy that you have finally made an attempt at metamorphosing your feelings into action for her. I do, however, find that you are quite agitated already. Even in Sorbonne, with all the cases you needed to study, you have not been quite the advocate of interludes in Blondeau’s lectures._
> 
> _However entertaining it is to taunt you, I do bring some sobering news. Well, as you asked, I have heard from Joly’s Musichetta of how Éponine received it. Her reaction was one of bemusement, she said. This was how she described it:_
> 
> _**‘At first, she was silent. And then there it was, this sort of madness bursting from her as she laughed. How she laughed, indeed! Then her hands clutched the letter rather tightly. Eyes wide, she skimmed the letter again and again. Her brows kept furrowing as she stared at the signatory. Then she looked at me rather cynically before making haste to her room, muttering to herself rather strangely. It was only a few moments later when I heard a muffled sob. The whole scenario has left me rather perplexed, as well.’** _
> 
> _If I know you at all, you would have rationalised your irrationality. I think you have succeeded at captivating her attention, but as to your intent of romancing her, well… that may remain a chimera if you persist in writing to her as you would make speeches. I know Prouvaire’s and Courfeyrac’s styles aren’t your way of dealing with your feelings, but perhaps learn from how they court people?_
> 
> _Completely vexed,_
> 
> _Combeferre_
> 
> _P.S. Why do you write when I am but a few blocks away?  
>  _

* * *

 

**DATE: 02 FEBRUARY 1834**

**TO: COMBEFFERE **  
****NO. 15, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU********

****FROM: ENJOLRAS  
            NO. 10, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU** **

 

 

>   _Combeferre,_
> 
> _Of course, I intend to ensure égalité with Éponine. I have not fought barricades to be a coward to her. Blondeau’s lectures are laden with anecdotes about his life — which are not even related to what we are studying — that it is all better abridged.  Robespierre may have long-winded speeches, but at least it all made sense when put together!_
> 
> _(Which as you know, is more than we can ever say of Buonaparte.)_
> 
> _Well, I did aim to make an impression. But it is out, nonetheless. I have no way of ever recanting it. I will just write… better, then? I still wish to hold no likeness to our friends’ ways. I would find myself too changed that I would not be ever sure of myself._
> 
> _Bring that up with your wife, and see who is more in ire._
> 
> _Enjolras_
> 
> _P.S. It is much more convenient. If I recall, you were the one who persuaded me to try to put my thoughts in writing?_

* * *

 

**DATE: 02 FEBRUARY 1834**

**TO: ENJOLRAS **  
****NO. 10, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU********

****FROM: COMBEFFERE  
           NO. 15, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU** **

  ****

 

> ****
> 
> ****
> 
> ****
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> _Yes, the first half of this page is as crisp as my worries of your fondness for her, and it shall remain so until you are persuaded to move it onward with her._
> 
> _Until then. (I bring you most unfortunate news in the vein that my dearest wife would deign to share your thoughts. Occasionally.)_
> 
> _Ah, to be free,_
> 
> _Combeferre_
> 
> _P. S. While I appreciate you heeding my advice, it would be perhaps better to peruse these scraps of paper for swatting flies or aiding the fires for cooking supper - which I shall thank you for. Were these Courfeyrac’s sketches of Blondeau in the back?? I faintly recall that he drew him as a pig and Joly added a hideous cravat for it!_

* * *

 

**DATE: 07 FEBRUARY 1834**

**TO: COMBEFFERE **  
****NO. 15, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU********

****FROM: ENJOLRAS  
          NO. 10, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU** **

 

 

>   _!_

* * *

 

**DATE: 07 FEBRUARY 1834**

**TO: ENJOLRAS **  
****NO. 10, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU********

****FROM: COMBEFERRE  
          NO. 15, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU** **

  

 

> _Yes, a reply most apt to my nonchalance and non-trenchancy over your previous missives. While I perceive your proclivity for mystery, I presume this is not a call to head to the streets as oft-used before the June Revolution. It is also not a notice for the coterie to meet in the back room of the Musain and discuss guerilla tactics. Hence, I can only assume it would be about Éponine. So yes, I fear your death should you not exclaim anything._
> 
> _My wife is most amused at my indignant shout upon receiving such a scant note._
> 
> _Completely apoplectic,_
> 
> _Combeferre_

* * *

 

**DATE: 14 FEBRUARY 1834**

**TO: ENJOLRAS **  
****NO. 10, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU********

****FROM: COMBEFERRE  
         NO. 15, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU** **

 

 

>  ??????????

* * *

 

**_What happened to Enjolras and **Éponine**? We do not know! Why? _ **

**_Post issues!_ **

**_\- Jehan Prouvaire_ **

**_P. S. I bid you, ami, to keep in touch as I faithfully record this anthology of letters between our two friends (and Combeferre) who are not privy to the information that Gavroche has delayed sending his letters because he was busy relaying this all to Courfeyrac at the Musain, and I happened to have overheard, and dared Courfeyrac with a bet on what did ** _ **Éponine reply! See you next time!**_**_ **


	2. In Which Libérté Means, “I Love You, Most Ardently”

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We finally know what Éponine wrote! 
> 
> (And what the amis thought, upon its revelation!)

**_Joly,_ **

**_Perchance you heard a word or two of Enjolras?Or of Éponine?_** **_Bahorel thought he has perhaps gone cinglé, and Combeferre has completely busied himself with his patients, and therefore, is best left unperturbed. Any report would ease the matron of their household._**

**_Perplexed,_ **

**_Feuilly_ **

 

—

 

**_Feuilly,_ **

**_Rest your worries, dear ami. According to Courfeyrac —_ ** **_or was it Grantaire who recounted the tale? I am unsure, for it was in the merry hours of Mr. and Mrs. Pontmercy’s wedding anniversary a fortnight ago that the account was given, and oh, it might have been Bossuet who gave a fortunate spin on it? — one evening, they were promenading across the bridge of the Seine, deep in discussion, and there Gavroche — who was out with his momes but hush about it and do not tell his sisters — soon found them in quite a severe, and haha, amorous embrace!_ **

**_Yes, you are right to read that with dubious cheer!_ **

**_Divinely appeased,_ **

**_Jolllly_ **

**_P. S. Prouvaire, I believe, has a fuller account on this, as he previously made an account to Bahorel, who made an account to you, who undoubtedly received it from Combeferre, who received the concern from the Mme. Enjolras, who may now retire with ease and fret over nuptials, which Prouvaire, in full circle, believes that we shall see a month from now. I wager a a year to pass for engagement, before seeing matters settled, but even my dearest Musichetta, mocked my reasons and ejaculated, “You think they carry enough patience for that? Ha!” I am most embarrassed._ **

 

**_—_ **

 

**_Prouvaire,_ **

**_Word has now fully come around the Latin Quartier of Enjolras and Éponine, but for purposes of making a full account, could you, perhaps, persuade the two to write to Mme. Enjolras and retire the matter?_ **

**_Exhausted, quite,_ **

**_Feuilly_ **

**_P.S. Joly remarked that you sensed that they will wed soon, and keep this to yourself, but I readily agree. Careful as Joly is, to err is understandable, but when it comes to impassioned characters the likes of these two, to wait is to die. As we all know now, it is much better to live._ **

 

**_—_ **

 

**_Feuilly,_ **

**_Ah, not to fret, for I shall not only persuade them to come clear with the Mme. Enjolras (in this I shall, with my dearest Azelma, sup with them to conjecture this), I shall also provide you a complete account of what has transpired!_ **  
****

**_You see, dear ami, it began the 29th of January when Enjolras, as Combeferre stated, “finally metamorphosed his feelings into actions for her” by way of a missive. Understandably, Éponine withheld a reply at first, resulting in Courfeyrac’s fears that Enjolras might become a “ninny” for penning letters back and forth with Combeferre of conjectures on what may have caused the delay — unknowing that the delay comes in the person of Gavroche, who recounted all this at the Musain and was taking a respite after an afternoon of running hitherto and thereto with much laughter._ **  
****

**_It was an accident to have this sweet music fall near my ears, but once heard, I could not help but make merry and form wagers with Courfeyrac on what could have Éponine finally replied — yes, the letter was finally with Gavroche during his respite that time, on the fateful day of the 7th of February, and yes, I appear circling and circling around this matter, but you cannot imagine the ridiculous notions that Courfeyrac dared what Éponine would have said (or done)!_ **  
****

**_Courfeyrac thought she would have cast the letter in flames, knocked on the door of Enjolras at No. 10 Rue de La Jean-Jacques Rousseau, and demanded a recantation, before locking him in an amorous, passionate embrace!_ **  
****

**_(Gavroche agreed and raised his glass, clinking it together with the fool.)_ **  
****

**_I merely laughed, and answered with faint certainty that Éponine would not have left such a thing unanswered as: 1) I pointed out that Éponine did form a reply, so such a notion would have been absurdly misrepresentative of their characters; 2) they are equal in most manners, so if anything would be in flames, it would be the nature of the missives written by these two proud, but frank individuals; and 3) yes, a nuptial would soon be had (many thanks, as well, for your acquiescence)!_ **  
****

**_Our argument rising to a din, which caused Mme Hucheloup to threaten us to be quiet or else be forcibly ushered to the door of the Musain, we quieted, hastily read Éponine’s letter, and shouted — resulting, indeed, in us being forcibly ushered to the door of the Musain — in exultation for what was written, and thus, ushered, we bid Gavroche run to Enjolras, and finally provide us one of the greatest symphonies of our circle._ **  
****

**_What a letter it was, I tell you!_ **  
****

**_Excited,_ **  
****

**_Jehan Prouvaire_ **  
****

**_P.S. I enclosed here another page to provide you an excellent imitation of the letter that I committed to memory for it was certainly fervent a letter!_ **

 

**_—_ **

 

**DATE: 07 FEBRUARY 1834**

**TO: ENJOLRAS**

**NO. 10, RUE DE LA JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU**

**FROM: ÉPONINE THÉNARDIER**

**NO. 32, RUE DE LA GRAND TRUANDERIE**

 

 

> _Dear Enjolras,_
> 
> _When first I received your letter,  I was impassioned to believe it false and unexpected of your character. But I held it to my heart, upon reading the missive from dawn until noon, from noon until midnight, from midnight until dawn. I ascertained that the fine cursive was not furtive, but determined, and that the paper was heavily imprinted upon, as you are wont to do during the days of revolution and more so, after the war when driven. I do not ask forgiveness for my scepticism, nor do I expect it from you, for I understand that we are of the same mind that misunderstandings in this form harbour no ill will. Thus, I believe you, and share your concern that I would have at first found it disconcerting._
> 
> _Now my reply, tardy as it was, and for which I will ask forgiveness for, came to be for I could not first form a sufficient one to yours. But as you said, discourse is a fine instrument to meet one’s soul, mind, body, and heart with another._
> 
> _Indeed, I agree, and share the sincerity of your passion. And I will not delay it, for it cannot be denied —_
> 
> _**I do not love you alone in words.** _
> 
> _A reprise, usually unhappy, with you will not be found melancholy. A rapture most divine, you would have figured, has belonged in my heart for you, and you cannot imagine my deepest joy to find it returned, without my asking, without any condition, without any fault. For — yes, I can now freely admit — that I cherish you wholeheartedly._  
>  ****
> 
> _That through you, I hope, in spite of fear._
> 
> _That through you, I resolve, in spite of regret._
> 
> _That through you, I love, and am loved in return, in spite of everything._
> 
> _That this story, previously filled with travesty, can be one that fights for a tomorrow — a tomorrow that comes no longer with misery._
> 
> _I do not love you alone in words._
> 
> _I do not love you alone in fear._
> 
> _But I love you with fullest hope and surest actions._
> 
>  
> 
> _**Courage, and onward,** _
> 
> _Éponine_
> 
>  


End file.
